The Best Man?

"If Clinton or Obama cannot find some miraculous way to lock down a nominating majority in the remaining primaries and caucuses, look for undecided super delegates to opt for the easiest way out and urge them to run together for the November election." - Craig Crawford
On her victory lap around the talk show circuit this morning, a reborn Hillary Clinton allowed "the possibility of sharing the Democratic presidential ticket with Barack Obama, but says voters still have to decide the party nominee," according to reports by the New York Times and others.

"That may be where this is headed," Clinton said, "but of course we have to decide who is on the top of ticket," adding that the voters in Ohio, at least, have decided that it should be she.

It may be true that Clinton's comeback on Super Tuesday, The Sequel makes a joint ticket "the easiest way out," but here's a better idea. At the convention, after neither senator has achieved a majority on the first ballot, the candidate with the fewer votes, presumably Clinton, makes a dramatic move.

Howard Dean has taken the chair as the second ballot begins.

"Mr. Chairman, Alabama yields to New York."

Hillary Clinton steps up to the floor mic in the New York delegation, to ululations from all around Pepsi Center.

"Mr. Chairman," the senator begins. "This has been a long and hard-fought campaign. All of the candidates for this party's nomination have made us proud to be Democrats. It was an honor to stand with them -- Mike Gravel, Joe Biden, Dennis Kucinich, Chris Dodd, ..."

Swelling applause.

"...Bill Richardson, John Edwards, Barack Obama..."

The delegates rise to their feet, cheering.

"...All of them, myself included, are ready to take back the White House for the American people."

Wild cheering.

"And on November 4th, we will! We will win a secure majority of the Senate. We will win an even bigger majority of the House of Representatives. AND WE WILL ELECT THE NEXT PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES."

Pandemonium.

After Dean finally restores order, Clinton continues:

"It has been a great campaign, but it is time to bring it to an end. It is time for us to pick a nominee who will unify the party, to choose the candidate who will lead us to victory. Mr.Chairman, the New York delegation proudly casts its 232 votes for the next president of the United States, JOHN EDWARDS."

As if out of nowhere, Edwards signs sprout all over the hall.

Chants of "John Edwards, John Edwards" shake the rafters of Denver's convention center.

Once again, Dean restores order and the count continues. The Edwards' tally increases as the Clinton delegates switch, until the chairman calls "Illinois."

Barack Obama is at the microphone.

"Mr. Chairman, America is at a turning point. We have made history in this campaign. We have shown that we are a people united. We have shown that it is not a person's gender that matters; we have shown that it is not a person's race that is important; we have shown that we Democrats judge a person only on the soundness of his or her ideas, on the quality of his or her character, on whether or not she or he is a leader who will bring about much-needed change. Hillary Clinton would make a great president..."

"Hillary Clinton, Hillary Clinton, Hillary Clinton..." chant the delegates.

"I would make a great president..."

"Yes we can, Yes we can, Yes we can..." the delegates yell.

"...But it is time to bring the debate to an end. It is time to come together as Democrats. It is time to bring the troops home. It is time to put an end the corruption and incompetence in the Oval Office. It is time to restore honor to the White House. It is time to send to Washington a great leader and a great American. Mr. Chairman, Illinois is proud to cast 153 votes for THE NEXT PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES, JOHN EDWARDS."

After the delegates quiet down again, Indiana yields to North Carolina whose chair moves to make the nomination unanimous.

In November, John Edwards wins, bringing a, um, new deal to the White House. The Democrats retain the senate seats in New York and Illinois, thus protecting their control of the upper body. Hillary Clinton goes on to a long and distinguished career as a United States Senator. Barack Obama begins planning for 2016. We are spared John McCain.

I know, I know. But, hey, it could happen.

1 comment:

Irene said...

Made the heart quicken for a while. Wish it were true.

 
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